We all want to be good looking, sexy, and appealing, but not everyone is born with the advantage of great genes, good bone structure and the symmetry that captivates the human eye. In our sex obsessed, materialistic and far too competitive culture, beauty has become connected to success, status and the notion of romantic love, which is carnally centered, unrealistic and more often than not, a bitter disappointment. The good news is that our culture is monopolized by mythology, meaningless media images and marketing ploys that do not adequately reflect the experiences, attitudes and values of individuals.
We are told certain supermodels are hot. Kate Moss, for example, was inserted into the public eye and became iconic, but many men are likely to shrug her off while women idealize her thin waifish figure, which does little to endear her to anyone besides designers whose trendy rags look best on one without curves or better yet, a hanger. We all know Kate isn’t all that and suspect Christie Brinkley, Cyndi Crawford and Naomi Campbell are skin deep cliches, botoxed, capped, spackled pore less, lit by shadows, showing off their best side in practiced expressions.
They are rigid, coiffed in long casual curls,an abstraction. Stiffly posed, shrewdly angled they set standards. With those blinding white smiles, they sell cosmetics, sagging skin creams, wonder balms for eye bags darkly circled, lip plumper, face fillers, miracle moisturizers, skin saving serums, cleansers, toners, free gifts too. They get rhapsodic because they’re preoccupied by beauty, by youth but could not care less about wisdom.
They’re not alone. But few of us are likely to devote ourselves to beauty regimes as lavish as these models do. These efforts are like a demanding full time job. And the results are rather mundane besides. You and I have no time for that, but we want to look our best, make a great impression, and inspire envy/ lust in other people less than we want to feel right in our osn skin.
The most attractive people are not necessarily blessed with all the advantages models, actors and other celebrities or those wanna bes have. They’re merely nouns. We are verbs! Verbs are drawn to other verbs by way of their unique spirit, their laughter, scent, voice, and an inventory of often unconscious qualities that defy base symmetry and primitive embellishments. Fabricated beauty’s a stupid score. We are true beauties when we are being, not becoming. If we are alive in each moment we are poetic, and poetry is what verbs wear best.
The crucial element in your beautiful life is an obvious yet elusive trait in many of us: confidence. This characteristic cannot be compromised by bad hair days, an evil pimple outbreak or the foul remarks of a hater ex unless you let them. If you believe, nothing can get to you. While you’re comparing yourself to expertly airbrushed head shots of this season’s swim suit goddess, letting someone criticize your corporeal decay and belaboring your flaws in an awful mirror, you’re usurping yourself, denigrating your natural beauty and doing so in a fashion that can completely tear away the foundation of who you are. Knowing who you are is what makes you luminous, bright eyed, charming and beautiful. Embrace what you love, be here now and don’t be afraid to wear your face, your funky favorite shirt and your personal style whatever it may be. Whatever you wear, whatever you are wear it well.
To be confident is to be natural, unencumbered by pretense, and at ease with yourself. Confidence comes from within, and it is recognized at times in posture, in the way one struts, stalks or saunters. It reveals itself when one greets the other and is betrayed by facial expressions. Confidence turns on what one says as well as one’s omissions. People who are assertive, earnest, artistic, passionate and devoted to living full lives tend to be the most magnetic people. The best of us are verbs because we peel away ourselves in layers. Renewed, redeemed’ released along the way. Shedding layers of ourselves is necessary as we make it new. We adapt, appreciating an ease beyond bone, where grace becomes marrow, and skin absorbs sun as salty gratitude oozes from our pores.
Be very aware of the skin as you enliven it. Exfoliate in tender circles towards your heart. Detox with dry brushes, coffee/sugar Scrubs, loofahs followed by tighteners,hemp henna tanners , smoothing lotions, essential oils, massages, motion, momentum before and after stretches, water, and rest. The first reverent round will make anyone more radiant, centered and stronger.
2STRENGTH, TEMPERANCE, FAITH
Strength is another broad but important component in the makeover, though it appears that means many things, figuratively and literally, including how much you’re willing to lift, how far you carry it and how well you manage the weight and distance. More is not always better. Balance is what we are after. But it teeters eternally between being and becoming. Extremists say what fails to kill us makes us stronger. Temperance finds a fulcrum called faith. These philosophical notions should be considered in anyone’s approach to adorning themselves with complimentary cosmetics, the allure of bling and more bling and an ongoing quest to compliment instead of mask the details of who we are; strong, confident humans are not loud, crass or painted up to face war without the burden of flaws or the benefit of bare naked bests.
3LESS IS MORE
Less is more. More is a lie. A little mascara, cherry Kool- aide stains a sweet pout, those eyebrows framing big baby browns in amber hues which pop above your grungy mustard colored mock turtle neck. Freshly scrubbed, subtle touches and a silver skull smiling on a long thick chain between liberated breasts. Today this is mine. You know a look that’s truly you when it’s easy to rock. It serves you well when your posture eases out of a slouch, skin slides soft against fabric, lines lilt Into form become motion, your eyes readily meeting those drawn to function, which knows better than to try too hard . It never tries at all. Do is function’s only cause.
4WE ARE TEXT
When we scrub our dead skin away, brandish nearly naked faces, forsake heavy make up, transcend trends, and embrace small concessions to wellness, like stretching, indigenous diet, hydration, rest, the impact upon our physical apparatus is visible immediately because the psyche, the soul and our being become whole. We glow under the warm light of our own attention which is balanced objectively by an inherent understanding that we are text, which is decoded, deciphered and evaluated. Our appearance is rhetorical, which means we need purpose, which sets the tone that realizes our topic by presenting it to our audience in earnest. Our self is neither implicit nor explicit, we are verbs, not nouns. Forsake adverbs. Evoke lean accurate adjectives.
Ambiguous not Ambivalent, never Arbitrary. Instead of embellishments, afford evidence to your ensembles. Let some small stunning bauble, an irreverent scarf, a leather coat or bralessness speak to who lurks beneath your brazen chest. This says we know ourselves as well you; we stake out the truth, push parameters and pull our self closer to truth. This means we are stronger, more confident and transparent too. While we’re convinced now, we do not need to belabor what your gaze confirms. Our quest is rewarded by beauty which is beholden to truth.
5YOUR EYES ARE MY MIRROR
Concealers, veils of translucent color, tubes of reckless red lip stain , thick black lash, large silly hoops , eyebrows evening out deep furrows of doubt, arch in ease, appeased by the serene heights of my forehead where wild fringe careens into curls that soften my visage and afford the golden light in my eyes vision for I am your mirror, you are mine. It is this recognition that realizes unadorned beauty as truth in the eye of those who behold the other’s .